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Being A Jasmine is A Struggle

jasmine and alladin

“Arab, huh…that’s pretty exotic!”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

“Are you sure you’re Arab? You don’t look Arab…”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Um, white folks, you may have forgotten, but you colonized the shit out of the Middle East (still kinda do). We come in all different shapes and sizes.

You ALWAYS get “randomly selected” for extra screening by the TSA.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Pulling an old white woman aside for extra screening doesn’t pardon your racism.

Who is this diet you speak of?

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Food is our first love. Mensaf. All day, err day bruh!

You feel obliged to give a disclaimer when you start dating someone new.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

I’m sure it’s a lovely restaurant but it’s in my uncle’s neighborhood. Lets go somewhere else…perhaps another city?

“Oh that’s interesting that you go to school. Your family is ok with it?”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

When you bring friends home you have to give them a mini orientation about your family’s unusual…rituals.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Baba, can you please stop yelling at the TV, you’re scaring Tiffany!

People assume you’re Muslim by default…

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

NEWS FLASH: We’re not all Muslim! We’re Christians, Jews, Atheists, and Beliebers. Get it straight.

Your siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, their spouses, and offspring have the capacity to populate an entire village.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

As an Arab girl you get categorized into one of two groups, you’re either a Haifa:

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Or a Nancy.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

When your grandmother calls – you answer reluctantly.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Hey Teta, I just got a new job!

“If you loved me you’d get married, yalla…I’m going to die soon!”

We share an unspoken language with other Arab women.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

A three second gaze can translate to: Yeah we should go soon, I’m down for pizza after. The score is 4-1. They say it’s going to rain tomorrow. Can I borrow that top? Of course I recorded Love & Hip Hop Atlanta.

Your parents typically have nothing nice to say about you…unless it’s to other people.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

“My daughter had a full scholarship to study abroad and now she works at the top firm in the state.”

During your college years you had the luxury of using the library as a cover for just about everything.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

I hope my mom isn’t reading this.

“Girl, why are you so conservative?”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

It’s called class.

You get called awiya for speaking up.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Brains, beauty, and sass. BOOM bitch!

Western media has fooled the world into thinking we’re oppressed.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Don’t believe everything you read, except this post…everything I wrote has been scientifically proven*

*This post has not been reviewed by any scientist

When your aunt tells you there’s an ‘3arees’, you’re secretly lightweight curious.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

He doesn’t sound like a complete loser…All right, I’m listening.

But after you meet said 3arees you feel the need to pay your aunt a visit

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Every birthday some jerk-off relative has to suggest that you’re ‘expired’.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

“You’re running out of eggs…When I was your age, I already had five kids.”

Don’t you have a cliff to drive off of?

You give people a simpler way of pronouncing your name but they insist on pronouncing it the ‘ethnic way’.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

“Speak in Arabic…it sounds so sexy!”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

ye3lan youm eli shoftak fi.

“Sooo how do you feel about America?”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

That’s like asking us how do we feel about pie. We love pie. Who doesn’t love pie?! End of discussion.

When you attend weddings, you’re hit with waves of “you’re next!”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

At any given moment a stranger will approach you and ask if you’re blah blah’s daughter

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

“I remember you when you were this little!!”

You must feel honored.

When you were younger, going out used to be more agonizing than going to the DMV.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

“I don’t know if you can go out. Ask your dad, ma khasne.”

“So when are you going to show me some belly dancing moves?”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

You, sir, are out of pocket.

“My friend is Arab — maybe you know them!”

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Don’t assume we know all Arabs…although I probably do.

Being asked our opinion on the Arab Spring, Palestine/Israel conflict, Iraq War…

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Do you have 17 hours to spare? It’s not exactly small talk.

You take advantage of people’s lack of knowledge of the Middle East and tell people you’re somebody important whenever the opportunity presents itself.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Because what the fuck do they know?

Your mom has tricked you into revealing secret information when reading your fortune in cup of coffee.

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

Shit.

But at the end of the day, we have our habibis and our hummus and we wouldn’t trade them for the world!

30 Struggles Of Being An Arab Girl

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